I have never been one of those people who feel compelled to shop that day after Thanksgiving. People fresh from venomous family confrontations nursing formidable hangovers placed in overcrowded settings motivated to overspend on useless items for those in their lives that warrant disdainful obligation. Yeah, baby, there's a Hallmark card for that. But this caught my attention today: on Friday at 4am, yes that's AM, Kohl's department store is opening its doors to begin the shopping melee. How do you dress for that kind of pre-dawn excursion? Captain America tee shirt, periwinkle yoga pants and night vision goggles? Do you stretch? Carb load? Or is the strategy to be as offensive as possible hygenically speaking, hoarding some flatulent simmerings for a trump card to give the wide berth advantage?
I admit it though, I feel drawn to such an event. I can't explain it rationally, only to say that at 4am there must be treasures beyond imagination at unbeatable prices especially at the onset of the coming recession. What's worth going to Kohl's at that hour? Cashmere socks? Maybe. My feet form the foundation of my comfort zone. If my feet are content, then all is right with the rest of me. Perhaps the illusive perfect purse? (I looked last week, it's not there) Jeans that take off six inches from my waist. Hell yeah. I would shop in the middle of the night for that the Grand Puhba of indigo perfection. So, in truth, it would come down to anything that would make my ass look smaller and more petite, my motivation for being a shopping lemming on the most psychotic consumer circus of the year.
4 comments:
AWESOME: People fresh from venomous family confrontations nursing formidable hangovers placed in overcrowded settings motivated to overspend on useless items for those in their lives that warrant disdainful obligation. That must have taken a few moments to craft.
So, are you going? That's the same thing I don't get. What do they have that I need? I stopped day-after-Thanksgiving shopping many years ago. We do usually buy our tree that day though.
Personally I loved this : " I would shop in the middle of the night for that the Grand Puhba of indigo perfection." My inclination would have been for a spelling of Poobah, but who knows if uit's even a word!
Last year I know of someone who picked up a laptop at Best Buy for $300. The machine was $200, but she spent $100 to buy a spot in the line from a guy who had camped out there overnight.
No thanks.
Thanks for all the feedback! Judy, you are most correct with the spelling of Poobah! I was in such a rush posting last night because I was on Cal's machine (we have router malfunction)and his motherboard was being a real mother. His computer was doing a reboot in the middle of my post. I'm surprised I got anything out last night! Morgan, thanks for the shout out on that run on wannabe. That one flowed because I was in a mood.
Correction wasn't intended. I defer to you when it comes to all things writing, spelling, grammar, or otherwise. It was merely an observation that I enjoyed the juxtaposition of Grand P.... and indigo perfection.
Bless you all for blogging. I'm holed up in Brookville, IN with nada going on. I can have a chuckle and keep in tough through the asynchronous virtual banter.
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